6:45:23 PM: 15 minutes to go! Channel 4 tell us that Alistair Darling, George Osborne, Vince Cable will be asked tough quesions by Guru-Murthy…

6:47:47 PM: The first tough question is surely how much of the youth audience will mistake Vince Cable for their granddad.

6:50:22 PM: Time stamps may be behind an hour due to our server being an hour behind. Sorry about that. Except not really.

6:51:20 PM: Let’s place some bets; who will be first to promise tax cuts whilst promising to cut spending whilst promising good frontline services?

6:53:26 PM: I’m kind of hoping Vince just screams ‘We’re all doom! Bugger this, I’m going to watch The Simpsons.’

6:57:30 PM: 3 minutes to go. Enough to make a cup of tea? I’m going to try it. Priorities, after all.

7:00:09 PM: RT I suspect that I will be bored out of my mind by “Ask the Chancellors” but here goes . . .

7:00:50 PM: Good evening Guru-Murphy. Your name comforts me.

7:01:54 PM: George Osborne MP: The economy isn’t working, young adults out of work. How to fix it? Change government.

7:02:16 PM: George Osborne MP didn’t say: PRESS YOUR RED BUTTON TO VOTE FOR US! Calls from a mobile might cost more.

7:03:09 PM: Vince Cable MP: Let’s create a new kind of economy. Change tax system, cut tax for average tax payer. Wealthy pay more.

7:03:28 PM: Alistair Darling MP: “Secure the recovery”. Buzz word bingo!

7:04:10 PM: Alistair Darling MP saying things like “sensible”. BINGO BINGO BINGO. On message. Well trained. No soul.

7:04:59 PM: First audience question: what’s your personal qualities?

7:05:36 PM: Not-your-granddad says “Ha! I was right about the crisis!” (sort of). And, well, rightly so. He has a good quality of getting it right.

7:07:06 PM: Alistair Darling makes a very good point. He called the mega!session years ago in the press… And got shouted down by Gordy.

7:07:20 PM: George Osborne – I’m sorry, his face put me off his words.

7:07:48 PM: Second audience question – what are you ACTUALLY going to do about the economy?

7:08:21 PM: Alistair Darling – No real answer, in my mind. “Protect frontline services”. Buzz words!

7:09:09 PM: George Osborne – we’ve got to sort this out together. Hmm. He said nothing.

7:10:15 PM: Vince Cable is still alive. Saying he wants to scrap Eurofighters and Trident. ID cards. If this was question time, somebody would clap.

7:11:19 PM: George Osborne talks over Alistair Darling. Rude – but do it again, keep me awake.

7:11:44 PM: Alistair Darling getting angry, sounds like he means it. “Poor poor judgement” to George Osborne.

7:12:40 PM: Interesting. Vince said something funny, audience laughed – and then clapped. I don’t think they’re supposed/allowed to react.

7:14:22 PM: Vince Cable taking on George with expert skill. Wins the audience over. Alistair sounds like an older and more angry Charlie Brooker.

7:14:58 PM: Vince taking on Alistair Darling now. He’s a ninja at the moment. I think he’s going to kick me through the TV if I do something wrong.

7:15:50 PM: Next audience question: which of you can guarantee patient services won’t be cut?

7:16:09 PM: George: Tory policy is that NHS budget will go up.

7:16:44 PM: Darling: Basically, he won’t. He talks around it.

7:17:16 PM: Vince: “Honest answer is we can’t guarantee it”. Audience want to clap.

7:18:42 PM: Audience member seen picking their nose as Darling speaks.

7:19:18 PM: RT Watching Ask The Chancellors, just for Alastair Darlings different hair colour laughs

7:19:51 PM: RT All 3 potential chancellors are talking a lot but saying very little.

7:21:10 PM: Audience question: Who will cut public sector pensions?

7:21:10 PM: Audience question: Who will cut public sector pensions?

7:21:42 PM: Darling: non-answer. Says “fair” a lot, other buzz words.

7:22:21 PM: Osborne: Cap on big pensions. Let’s do an audit, within weeks of taking office.

7:22:48 PM: Cable: Doesn’t clarify he’s not your granddad. We need to do something about this, needs to be reformed, it’s a scandal.

7:25:00 PM: Alistair Darling has a dig at Osborne. Osborne fires back. Vince digs in. It’s interesting seeing Lib Dems on a real platform for once.

7:26:29 PM: 25 minutes in to this, and I haven’t had time to finish making my cup of tea yet. This is quite interesting.

7:27:12 PM: George Osborne uses the phrase “death tax”. Alistair is stuttering over his words and looks very flustered.

7:27:35 PM: Audience question: will my middle-income income tax go up?

7:28:16 PM: Cable: £700 less tax for you. Don’t spend it all on sweets.

7:28:31 PM: Osborne: There will be tax rises. We will work hard to avoid it for you.

7:29:04 PM: Alistair: I think he might cry when he answers this on. “Look” he begins. Most of the taxes over £150k.

7:30:13 PM: Osborne arguing with Alistair. Alistair hits back with a joke, people laugh and clap again.

7:31:02 PM: Cable: “We’re going to have a very difficult decade”. Aka ‘We’re all fucked!’. He didn’t say that, but it was in his eyes.

7:32:51 PM: Lots of tax questions. Basically, he’s what I think they’re all thinking: “Yeah, we’ll raise tax. But DON’T SAY THAT BRAIN. DON’T!”

7:35:09 PM: Audience question from a rich lady asking if higher taxes for her will drain the country. Answers all subtext say: Ego much.

7:36:21 PM: George Osborne looks like he’s had his training from Barack Obama’s team. He looks very calm.

7:37:51 PM: Alistair Darling looks like he’s trying to strangle an invisible cat whilst talking. Put the hands down, Darling.

7:40:19 PM: Audience question: we the tax payers bailed out the banks. How are you going to stop the bonuses?

7:40:54 PM: Vince Cable’s answer gets a round of applause again for his answer. Which I don’t think the audience are supposed to do…

7:41:38 PM: Alistair Darling’s answer is crushed by his personality and his eyebrows. No audience reaction.

7:42:24 PM: George Osborne wants a bank tax.

7:42:50 PM: Our Guru asks if it’s morally wrong to get a bonus of £1m in banking.

7:43:20 PM: Osborne: Boring answer. Vince: Yes. It’s morally wrong. Alistair starts answering, an audience member folds their arms.

7:45:26 PM: Audience question, which was basically ‘You’re all shit. How do we know you will stop being shit?’.

7:45:47 PM: Alistair answers, but his eyebrows appear to be eating his forehead.

7:46:23 PM: George answers, and basically says ‘Yeah, we didn’t notice this either. Press RED, VOTE ME!’.

7:46:42 PM: Will Vince become a Ninja again and KO them?

7:47:32 PM: Vince: “some of us did warn”. Audience round of applause. Ninja!

7:48:28 PM: Audience question: I’m a student. Under which of you will guarantee I’ll get a job?

7:48:54 PM: Osborne: “I wish you well…” Translation: you’re fucked. And he’s not far wrong, pretty much.

7:49:42 PM: Alistair: ‘I had a conversation with my son about this last night. He’s about your age.’ Darling, keepin’ it personal.

7:50:59 PM: Vince’s answer: The government can do something. But there’s limits.

7:52:22 PM: Closing pitch time! 60 seconds each.

7:52:54 PM: Darling: You’re all concerned. He thinks Labour have made the right judgement. I doubt anybody is sold.

7:53:15 PM: “Fair and stronger society”. BUZZ WORD DING!

7:54:07 PM: Vince: Relays agenda. “Who can you trust? Labour government lead us here. Tories had two big recessions. Lib Dems are different”

7:54:23 PM: Round of applause for Vince.

7:54:47 PM: Osborne: You can make a judgement of Labour. “5 more years”. BUZZ WORD DING!

7:55:05 PM: Osborne: “There’s not going to be a Liberal Democrat government”.

7:55:29 PM: Osborne: “You decide if you want to change your country”. No round of applause.

7:56:10 PM: My thoughts: Vince was amazing during this. He had the audience almost completely. Almost no reaction to Labour or Conservatives.